This interview was published in the commemorative booklet for the 20th anniversary banquet on June 14, 2025.
Dear Der Nareg, I am infinitely grateful for this interview. Your honest, sincere, and personal comments provide an insight into your ministry and reflect your life experiences, philosophy, and journey. Thank you for sharing your life stories with us. With love and respect, Dr. Louiza Kubikian
- Why did you choose religion instead of pursuing another profession? Was it a calling?
Life circumstances led me to become a seminarian. I was born and raised in Kessab, a small town on the border with Turkey in northwest Syria, which was once part of our historical Armenian Kingdom of Cilicia.
One week after starting high school, the principal shut down the freshman year because only a handful of students had passed the standardized national exam, the Brevet, at the end of middle school. Since there was only one high school in the town, relocating to another area wasn’t an option due to my family's financial challenges.
At that point, the seminary in Lebanon became my only opportunity, especially after a seminarian friend shared his experiences with me that summer. In October 1993, I became a seminarian after Archbishop Ardavast Terterian spoke to the dean and helped me gain acceptance weeks after the academic year had started.
I regularly attended church in Kessab, but I never imagined I would become a priest. The Armenian Theological Seminary of the Great House of Cilicia, where I studied for seven years, played a significant role in nurturing my vocation. I was on a track designed for celibate priests, but upon graduating in 2000, I realized that I was not ready for that challenging path. I continued my education in Lebanon and was later recruited to serve the Eastern Prelacy in New York. Serving in a parish and interacting with people helped me gain a fresh perspective, and I knew that I was ready to become a Der Hayr, a parish priest serving in a local community.
Life circumstances and unexpected happenstance have significantly influenced my journey. However, who’s to say that God wasn’t using those challenges and opportunities to gently nurture a priestly vocation within me and guide me to where He intended me to be?
- Who were your mentors, and how did they influence your journey (Spiritual and Non-spiritual)
My list of influences is long and includes teachers, mentors, public figures, and authors who have impacted me directly and indirectly.
I am particularly grateful to my parish priest, Der Aram Kelenjian, for his love and compassion. My seminary teachers: Archbishops Ardavast Terterian and Archbishop Zareh Aznavorian, along with Fr. Shahan Sarkisian, Abraham Alikian, Kevork Kandaharian, Krikor Shahinian, and Garo Hovannessian—have imparted wisdom, faith, knowledge, and discipline.
In New York, our two prelates and my spiritual mentors, Archbishops Oshagan Choloyan and Anoushavan Tanielian, have provided me with leadership, paternal care, and guidance.
Additionally, my academic and pastoral formation has been shaped by the insights of great thinkers such as Hans Urs von Balthasar, Karl Barth, Pope Benedict XVI, Alexander Schmemann, Eugene H. Peterson, Carl Rogers, Marsha M. Linehan, and Bishop Robert Barron.
- How has Annie's unwavering support influenced your ministry and her role in your life?
In Genesis 2:18, the Bible states that God created Eve as a "helper suitable for Adam." However, the Hebrew term "ezer kenegdo" implies a deeper role than just that of an assistant; it indicates an equal and complementary counterpart.
When Annie and I met under the most unromantic circumstances, we had no idea God was preparing us for this ministry. During our long-distance courtship, Annie encouraged me to embrace my vocation to become a Der Hayr and stood by my side from the beginning. I never felt alone in my ministry; it always felt like we were on this journey together. Her positive energy, friendliness, and openness are just a few outstanding qualities she brings to our pastoral work.
I feel blessed to have a partner who encourages me when I am in doubt, provides honest feedback when my sermons fall flat, remains flexible when I become rigid, and helps me gather my thoughts when I feel scattered. Annie's heart and mind are deeply invested in our ministry, often even more than mine. I feel blessed and grateful to have Annie as my wife, my partner, and complementary counterpart.
- How did you find the courage to take on the role of pastor at the young age of 26? How did you overcome your fears?
The word “fear” doesn’t fully capture what I felt when I was assigned as a new pastor. I vividly remember the day of my installation on May 22, 2005. While the MC was giving the opening remarks, I excused myself to the bathroom and vomited from anxiety.
As a young and inexperienced pastor in a large community, I often felt overwhelmed. People would frequently say, "You are such a young Der Hayr," or "You are a young couple." It felt like a reminder that I wasn't ready for this responsibility. I couldn't see these comments as genuine compliments. So, I used my sense of inadequacy to motivate myself to do my best. I suppressed my feelings and focused on the task at hand with self-discipline, integrity, and consistency.
It took me many years to realize that I wasn’t practicing what I preached. As I matured in my spiritual life, I understood that Peter, Paul, and almost all the apostles of Jesus were only humans and made mistakes. I recognized that God didn't expect me to be perfect. This new perspective helped me embrace my mistakes and continue my ministry with confidence, remembering that confidence means “with faith" in Latin.
- Your education & degrees. Why did you choose Pastoral Theology and Clinical Mental Health Counseling, and how have these degrees helped you as a spiritual leader?
When I graduated from the Seminary in Bikfaya and studied at the Near East School of Theology in Beirut, I remember the courses I took in pastoral studies felt like a fresh breath of air. Those courses played a significant role in galvanizing my decision to go to the priesthood. When I went to St. John’s University’s MA program in Theology, I chose the pastoral concentration to deepen my knowledge. Years later, I can articulate the core reason for that interest with a clear vision: Jesus did not start a new religion, He did not build a new temple; Jesus started a new movement, a community of men and women seeking to live the kingdom of God here on earth. Pastoral studies is the science of unpacking the mystery and wisdom that Christianity offers and making these teachings applicable in our daily lives so we too can live in the Kingdom here and now. Pastoral work is a ministry of presence that helps a pastor to be present in the lives of the parishioners as they journey through the joys and the sufferings of life.
As I interacted more with people, I realized that understanding human psychology is essential to a pastor's work. This insight led me to pursue a degree in clinical mental health counseling. Pastoral theology and psychology often intersect in my ministry, particularly in bereavement support, marriage preparation, counseling, and youth engagement. Most importantly, I view education as an ongoing process and strive to stay current by participating in continuing education, reading, and attending seminars.
I would like to thank the Armenian Prelacy for funding my education and express my gratitude to our former Prelate, Archbishop Oshagan, for his encouragement.
- Fatherhood and how it changed your perspective on the challenges faced by our youth today
Becoming a parent is an unearned gift that God bestows upon us. I feel incredibly blessed to be the father of three wonderful children: Hovsep, Laurie, and Avedis. When I first became a father, I discovered a new depth of love. I also realized that I am responsible for my children's emotional and physical well-being. So love and responsibility go hand in hand.
Another benefit of fatherhood has been the development of a more profound sense of understanding and compassion for the youth in our community. I now look at them like my children—with love, understanding, and certain expectations. I believe they should strive to be responsible members of our society.
I know our youth face many challenges, but these challenges will help them grow and mature in faith and wisdom. I take pride in our youth and continue to dedicate them to God in my prayers.
- Please talk about the staple programs you introduced for Young Adults: Summer Camp, Salt & Light, Ordinations, Podcasts, website development, E-Bulletin, etc.
All the programs and initiatives you mentioned were developed based on assessing our community's needs. While each program has its unique aspects, they all share some common goals: building community, sharing the Gospel, and making the teachings and traditions of the Armenian Apostolic Church relevant to our people living in America in the 21st century. Some of these initiatives have been more successful than others, but I have learned the importance of trying new things and not being afraid of failure.
- Your philosophy on life, challenges, rewards, and most significant achievements
Two life-changing ideas have shaped my outlook on life. The first is the Biblical imperative of “So in everything, do to others what you would have them do to you,” that Jesus gives in the Sermon on the Mountain (Matthew 7:12), and the second is Scott Peck’s famous “Life is difficult. This is a great truth, one of the greatest truths. It is a great truth because once we truly see this truth, we transcend it. Once we truly know that life is difficult – once we truly understand and accept it – then life is no longer difficult. Because once it is accepted, the fact that life is difficult no longer matters.” Jesus’s words have helped me to try to live my life harmoniously with the people around me, while Peck’s wisdom has helped me manage my expectations and live harmoniously with myself.
I strive to embrace life's challenges with curiosity, seeking to discover the lessons they offer. I find satisfaction in life's small rewards, such as a child's smile or a cup of coffee shared with a loved one. Additionally, I don't like to pinpoint a single accomplishment as my most significant because I believe in approaching everything I do wholeheartedly and enjoying the process.