"I Have a Hole in My Heart"
I recently participated in the “Faith & Life” weekly radio program hosted by the Christian Education Department of the Catholicosate of Cilicia on Radio Voice of Van in Beirut, Lebanon. During the online interview titled “What are the most relevant emotional issues that society is currently facing?” which lasted about 45 minutes, I focused on the increasing cases of anxiety, depression, and personality disorders. These issues are exacerbated by our reliance on technology and our virtual connections through cell phones and other electronic devices, leading to a disconnect from real relationships and creating an emotional crisis for many. My comments and observations were primarily based on Jonathan Haidt’s recent bestseller, “The Anxious Generation,” which I previously wrote about.
In the final interview question, I was asked what the clergy can do to help mitigate the crisis. While the simple answer would have been "a lot," I knew that wouldn't be sufficient. I discussed several points, but after listening to the interview again today, I felt I could have articulated my thoughts more effectively. My response seemed to imply that clergy are guardians of truth and knowledge who must impose our perspective on others when they are enjoying themselves. I don't want to come across as a buzzkill, but rather, I want to reassure you of our role as clergy in sharing the good news of God's salvation. From this perspective, I aimed to focus on the following points:
1. Social media can encourage and exacerbate narcissistic tendencies in its users. The validation received through likes and shares can inflate a person's sense of self-importance. However, such behavior, stemming from deep-rooted insecurities, ultimately leads to isolation as society does not generally tolerate excessive self-centeredness. In Sunday's requiem service, the final Gospel proclamation highlights Jesus' message of self-denial: "Those who love their life lose it, and those who hate their life in this world will keep it for eternal life" (John 12:25). While this principle contradicts societal norms, it reflects the wisdom in Jesus' teachings, emphasizing that self-denial and humility not only make us better friends but also pave the way for our journey to eternal life.
2. Depression and anxiety are common responses to life's stressors, external events, and sometimes imbalances in brain chemicals. Many people try to combat these difficult feelings by striving to be and stay happy. However, happiness cannot be a life goal, as it is a result that we experience when we achieve specific goals in life. Renouncing pain and suffering and trying to avoid them will not make us happy, but facing our fears and challenges and overcoming them will bring us joy. St. Paul beautifully expresses this in the following words: "And not only that, but we also boast in our afflictions, knowing that affliction produces endurance, and endurance produces character, and character produces hope, and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us" (Romans 5:3-5). This powerful message encourages and motivates us to confront challenges with courage and determination.
3. Most experts encourage their anxious and depressed clients to meditate and do breathing exercises. It is true that when we slow down our breathing and replace our shallow breathing with deep breathing, the rushing of fresh oxygen into our brain will slow down, and our anxiety will subside. Also, when we intentionally focus on one thing, it becomes impossible to think about another thing. Our brains cannot think about two things at the same time. However, if our meditative exercise is focused on ourselves, the emptiness inside us will surface and render our efforts fruitless, or worse, it may become a worship of the self. As Christians, we must remember that God is the answer because our faith is a faith of hope. We often confuse hope with certain expectations and magical thinking. But hope is a virtue because it helps us to look beyond our despair caused by pain and suffering and see the big picture where the Incarnate Son of God conquers death with His Resurrection and assures us that not even death can destroy us. We manifest the acceptance of this message of hope in our worship as our life circle becomes hinged on Sunday’s Badarak, where we nourish our souls with the presence of God and go forth and live out our faith for the next six days of the week. When God is at the center of our lives, nothing else claims our life's center stage. “You have made us for yourself, O Lord and our heart is restless until it rests in you.” is the famous passage from St. Augustine’s Confessions, and Cardinal Dolan of NY once paraphrased this profound thought and said, “I have a hole in my heart, and a bowl of ice cream cannot fill that hole.”
This is how I define our role as clergy: encouraging and teaching our parishioners and church members to face their challenges.
Prayerfully,
