PASTA WITH OUR PASTOR BREAKING BREAD, REFLECTING ON GOD, EXPLORING THE SOUL

The Healing Presence: Exploring the Role of the Holy Spirit in Mental Health at St. Sarkis

DOUGLASTON, NY – May 13, 2025 — A warm plate of Bolognese pasta and deep spiritual insight were on the menu at St. Sarkis Church’s third session of “Pasta with our Pastor,” a Tuesday night series led by Fr. Nareg Terterian. With a full house that included guests from as far as New Jersey and many first-time participants, the evening tackled a profound and timely topic: “The Role of the Holy Spirit in Mental Health.”

Fr. Nareg began by framing the night’s exploration around the intersection of faith and psychology, specifically how the Holy Spirit contributes to psychological healing, emotional regulation, and relational transformation. He connected biblical teachings and modern therapeutic approaches in a manner both grounded and accessible, drawing on his pastoral experience and clinical background.

Introducing the Holy Spirit

Setting a theological foundation, Fr. Nareg reminded attendees that the Holy Spirit is not a symbolic force or emotional spectacle, as sometimes portrayed in Pentecostal settings, but rather God's living, personal presence. He walked participants through scripture—from Genesis to the Gospels—highlighting how the Spirit was present in creation, revealed at Jesus’ baptism, and sent to dwell within believers after Christ’s ascension.

Quoting the Gospel of John and St. Paul’s letters, he presented the Spirit as the Paraclete—a Greek term meaning “called alongside”—a divine counselor and advocate who provides companionship and healing on life’s journey.

Emotional Healing and the Spirit’s Presence

Fr. Nareg then bridged theology with psychotherapy, explaining how trauma often fragments the self and dysregulates emotion. He introduced the concept of “internal co-regulation,” likening the Holy Spirit to the safe other in attachment theory—a comforting, grounding presence that promotes healing from adverse childhood experiences and emotional wounds.

“We often say in trauma therapy, ‘the body keeps the score,’” Fr. Nareg explained, referencing Dr. Bessel van der Kolk’s renowned book. “But the Spirit ministers not just to body and mind, but also to the soul. Psychotherapy is, at its core, soul care.”

He emphasized how the Holy Spirit supports the integration of fragmented experiences and helps individuals return to a place of inner peace. “When Jesus called the Holy Spirit the Counselor, He promised a continual presence to help us live regulated, whole, and hope-filled lives,” he added.

Understanding Emotional Dysregulation

The session turned practical with a clear definition of emotional dysregulation: the inability to manage or respond to emotions in a way that is socially or functionally appropriate. Through examples ranging from childhood tantrums to adult outbursts, Fr. Nareg normalized these experiences while pointing out that adults often lack language or tools to identify what’s happening inside them.

He candidly shared his own experience of stress-driven dysregulation while preparing a lecture, using it to illustrate how self-awareness and intentional grounding can restore calm.

DBT and Radical Acceptance

Introducing Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT), developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan, Fr. Nareg praised its balance of emotional acceptance and behavioral change. He highlighted Linehan’s personal journey from psychiatric hospitalization to becoming a pioneering psychologist, underscoring the power of radical acceptance: fully acknowledging reality without judgment.

“Pain is inevitable,” he quoted. “Suffering is optional.” He explained how our response to pain—through surrender, mindfulness, and spiritual depth—determines whether we spiral into despair or move toward growth.

The Role of the Spirit in Regulation

Returning to scripture, Fr. Nareg unpacked the fruits of the Spirit from Galatians—love, joy, peace, patience, and more—as markers of emotional and relational maturity. He encouraged practices like breath prayer, silence, and worship as spiritual tools that activate the parasympathetic nervous system, helping the body move from anxiety to peace.

He reminded the audience that the Holy Spirit is not just a theological abstraction but the very breath of God that animates and sustains us. “You are the temple of the Holy Spirit,” he said, quoting 1 Corinthians. You are not your own.”

Tackling Forgiveness

Before concluding, Fr. Nareg addressed a lingering question from the previous session: Why is forgiveness so difficult? He distinguished forgiveness from reconciliation, explaining that forgiving someone doesn’t mean restoring trust or forgetting harm, but rather releasing the need to retaliate. “You hurt me,” he said, “but I choose not to hurt you back. That’s forgiveness.”

Looking Ahead

The evening closed with heartfelt applause and a preview of next week’s session: “Trauma, Anxiety, and Trusting God.” Fr. Nareg admitted he had yet to decide what pasta he’d prepare, but he promised both nourishment and insight.

“Pasta with our Pastor” continues to be a unique blend of hospitality, theological depth, and psychological wisdom. With topics that touch the heart and tools that equip the soul, the series proves to be a powerful ministry for today’s challenges.