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I participated in the first day of the Homenetmen’s Navasartian Games of the Eastern United States, which are taking place in Providence, RI, this year. I have been attending the games for the past few years and enjoy watching my children play and compete. It's also a great opportunity to see old friends, make new acquaintances, and engage in conversations with people who recognize me as a priest, even though they might feel differently when they see me in casual attire. Not wearing my clergy collar on the fields during the games may discourage some, but it allows others to have more friendly and meaningful discussions.

One of yesterday's conversations was with a young man I hadn’t seen in over a decade. After some small talk, as we were about to part ways, he proudly pointed to his young son and said, "We taught him all about God, Asdvadz, Jesus, and all of that.” Then he looked at me, presumably waiting for a validation. In the past, I might have responded differently. I might have said, "I am a priest, and I don’t know it all; how can you claim to have taught your young son all of that?" or "That’s amazing, but I want you to attend church. I haven’t seen you for a long time." These responses would have come from a mindset that sees God as the CEO and us priests as customer representatives, responsible for promoting God when people are disengaged and protecting God when people feel disappointed. I have given up that mindset, so instead, I maintained a straight face and walked away.

The example above may not sound like the "meaningful discussion" I mentioned earlier, but it was a reflective moment for me. It made me question how we dropped the ball. How did the first nation to adopt Christianity as a state religion in 301 become so disengaged? How come over 600 athletes and their family members attend the annual Navasartian Games routinely every year (which is heartwarming to witness) without minding the significant travel and accommodation expenses but show no interest in attending church services, seminars, and symposiums? I have asked this question to individuals and groups, and someone would rarely tell me that their disengagement was due to ideological reasons and that they do not agree with this or that teaching in the church. Instead, I have heard lots of excuses. Whenever I tried to debunk one excuse, people came up with three more. So, I have reached a point where I don't argue with their excuses but pray that they will find The Reason - God - and experience the joy of worshiping God in His house among the members of the same faith community.

We cannot solely blame our people and shirk all responsibility. As a church, we must acknowledge that we have failed to nurture the spiritual needs of our community. We haven't refined our message and the gospel proclamation in a constantly changing world. The Protestant theologian Jürgen Moltmann, in the mid-1970s, spoke about identity and relevance in his monumental work "The Crucified God." His ideas have provided me with a framework to examine our church, and sometimes, I'm afraid to admit that we struggle with relevance and have not understood our identity clearly and definitively.

On my flight home from California last week, my wife recommended that I watch "Cabrini," a movie depicting the life of the first American Catholic canonized as a saint. Interestingly, the movie was on JetBlue's list of in-flight movies. I am not a big fan of hagiography because when I read or watch the lives of saints, I get discouraged that I will never be like them. Another reason is that most hagiographic films tend to be cinematically and visually compromised. However, I was pleasantly surprised by the quality of the production and the simplicity of the narrative in this movie. I was also inspired by the courage that Mother Cabrini demonstrated in her life, fighting against the challenges she faced, including the church’s hierarchy, New York City’s bureaucracy, and the prejudice and bias that people held at that time in her mission to provide hope to immigrant Italians in the slums of New York. One thing that struck me in the entire movie was Cabrini’s clear understanding of her mission from the earliest days of her life and how true she stayed to that mission until the end.

Learning about Mother Cabrini's life made me question my understanding of my mission as a priest. I felt sad that self-understanding and understanding of my mission had not been part of my training in the seminary. We were taught different things in a fragmented manner and given vast knowledge, and we were told that "service" is our mission. But without a clear understanding of the pastor's identity and a defined sense of mission, we can quickly become administrators of Sacraments and customer reps for God. 
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We need to be with our people, walk with them in their journey, and help them understand that our life is a pilgrimage that prepares us to be with God. We don’t necessarily need to learn about God, Asdvadz, Jesus, and all of that, but we must talk to God, see what god is doing in our lives, and how we live as children of God as we nurture a relationship with God. Our faith is not knowledge but a profound experience. We worship God because worship elevates us, and God dwells amongst us through the Sacraments and the Word of God. 

On the feast of the Holy Transfiguration of Christ that we celebrate this Sunday, I pray that God will transform us and open our spiritual eyes, hearts, and minds to see Him, hear Him, and touch Him in the Armenian Apostolic Church and guide our pilgrimage to His Kingdom. 

Prayerfully,